When Squeaker was just 11 years old and frequently throwing all of her belongings out the window of her room, throwing rocks at my car, standing on top of the furniture shouting obscenities, running away, threatening to jump off buildings or into traffic, calling me all sorts of nasty names to my face or to my toddler son, and bullying the little kids, I really had to think long and hard before I adopted her about whether or not I would be able to handle her behaviors.
A near move to residential treatment, lots of stalling by social workers and attornies, a great deal of trial and error with meds and treatment teams and she finally stabilized to the point that her social worker, attorney, and I felt it was okay to move ahead. And during that time mostly what I thought to myself (and said to Ana) was, "What if she acts this way or worse when she is a teenager?"
Fast forward two years later, Squeaker's adoption was finalized this summer at the age of 13 1/2. We've had a bumpy road but it has evened out considerably from where we started.
Until the past few weeks. The good news is that so far my car has been safe and she hasn't trashed the house or her room. She has said she doesn't want to be here but has not run away. She hasn't threatened herself. So that is a great deal of progress that we've been able to hold onto.
But she has yelled at me every day this week, actually almost any time we've had a conversation. Several days she has violently screamed at me and at Ana. Although she is often sweet with the little boys, their interaction must be supervised because her mood changes so abruptly and she can take a mean turn at the slightest offense.
I have talked to her psychiatrist about the recent increase in reactivity and irritability but the doctor thinks her meds are fine for now. Living with so much unpredictability is difficult and sometimes the other kids have a hard time being friendly back when she is suddenly in a more social mood. It's hard for me and Ana too but we can do it more easily knowing some of the reason behind her erratic emotions.
Our program social worker once told us that we are able to see and appreciate the kid behind the behavior in a way that some people can't. It was a nice complement. We do love and see value in kids despite their behaviors but even more than that we can see the potential in them that is so trapped by the fear, hurt, and anger because of what has been done to them. I only hope we are as good at helping them break through all that so they can become whole and free and healthy the way they should have always been allowed to be.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Monday, September 29, 2008
School Dilemmas
It's still only September and I'm already fretting over decisions about school for next year.
The Boss will be old enough to start kindergarten, but it's doubtful he'll be ready. I've been thinking about homeschooling for him and even if he is ready to start, may go that route since I don't really want him in public school but cannot afford private. I don't want to delay a year because he would end up in the same grade as Seamonkey who does not struggle with the same difficulties and delays.
Squeaker is scared to death to start high school next year. She is concerned, with good reason, about her ability to regulate her emotions in the much bigger setting of public high school. She has asked me several times if I will allow her to be homeschooled. I actually think that would be best but I'm concerned, also with good reason, about her ability to regulate her emotions at home when the stress of schooling is added. I think she will do much better academically with a more customized lesson plan because she tests very high in most subjects but has low grades due to her homework and class work. She has been able to learn all the subject matter required while rarely turning in the work because she has an amazing memory and is an auditory learner. I would like for her to be able to attend a private Christian school too but no Christian school I've ever heard of will accept a child with emotional and behavior problems. She'd probably be expelled the first week.
I know that the potential for conflict and outbursts will be greater if we do decide to homeschool so for the remainder of this year my brain will be constantly running through pros and cons. The very idea of dealing with her behavior through four years of public high school gives me the shudders. So for today at least I'm definitely leaning another way on that decision.
The Boss will be old enough to start kindergarten, but it's doubtful he'll be ready. I've been thinking about homeschooling for him and even if he is ready to start, may go that route since I don't really want him in public school but cannot afford private. I don't want to delay a year because he would end up in the same grade as Seamonkey who does not struggle with the same difficulties and delays.
Squeaker is scared to death to start high school next year. She is concerned, with good reason, about her ability to regulate her emotions in the much bigger setting of public high school. She has asked me several times if I will allow her to be homeschooled. I actually think that would be best but I'm concerned, also with good reason, about her ability to regulate her emotions at home when the stress of schooling is added. I think she will do much better academically with a more customized lesson plan because she tests very high in most subjects but has low grades due to her homework and class work. She has been able to learn all the subject matter required while rarely turning in the work because she has an amazing memory and is an auditory learner. I would like for her to be able to attend a private Christian school too but no Christian school I've ever heard of will accept a child with emotional and behavior problems. She'd probably be expelled the first week.
I know that the potential for conflict and outbursts will be greater if we do decide to homeschool so for the remainder of this year my brain will be constantly running through pros and cons. The very idea of dealing with her behavior through four years of public high school gives me the shudders. So for today at least I'm definitely leaning another way on that decision.
Sunday, September 28, 2008
*TGIAM
More emotional outbursts today. Squeaker seems to be reverting back to some of her old behaviors in many ways. She blames it on me saying she was doing good but I still treat her like a child so she's going to act like one. Yeah, well...not much I can say to that.
Her initial snarky outburst snowballed for much of the afternoon picking up a pretty nasty collection of sticks and stones along the way. By the time she really got going she was shouting at me "I'm going to kill your stupid sister." and "You're the worst mom in the world."and "I hate you!" to the both of us, throwing in plenty of profanities for good measure punctuated by door slams.
When I went upstairs to see if she was calm enough to come to dinner she acted like everything was fine, being silly and trying to chat with me at dinner. I wasn't feeling especially friendly yet.
She can be so unpredictable and volatile, feeling completely justified in her anger, and then calms down and expects everyone else to move on without comment or consequence while they are still pulling out barbs and licking their wounds. She cries to me frequently that her friends turn on her no reason, not seeing the connection at all, blaming others for situations she herself creates.
It's been an exhausting weekend with more sure to come this week, but at least there's school to give us all some space.
*Thank God it's almost Monday.
Her initial snarky outburst snowballed for much of the afternoon picking up a pretty nasty collection of sticks and stones along the way. By the time she really got going she was shouting at me "I'm going to kill your stupid sister." and "You're the worst mom in the world."and "I hate you!" to the both of us, throwing in plenty of profanities for good measure punctuated by door slams.
When I went upstairs to see if she was calm enough to come to dinner she acted like everything was fine, being silly and trying to chat with me at dinner. I wasn't feeling especially friendly yet.
She can be so unpredictable and volatile, feeling completely justified in her anger, and then calms down and expects everyone else to move on without comment or consequence while they are still pulling out barbs and licking their wounds. She cries to me frequently that her friends turn on her no reason, not seeing the connection at all, blaming others for situations she herself creates.
It's been an exhausting weekend with more sure to come this week, but at least there's school to give us all some space.
*Thank God it's almost Monday.
Saturday, September 27, 2008
Find a Happy Place, Find a Happy Place
Mega-emotion day around here. I had to have several conversations with Squeaker about how she has been treating the other kids. Talks like these always bring up a flood of emotions. Today it was tears, anger, frustration, major attitude, hatefulness, anger, fear, and yet again more tears.
For the record, I am not all that comfortable with over-the-top displays of emotion. Which is funny as they are a major occupational hazard for foster/adoptive parents of traumatized kids. Also kind of funny considering I felt like a bit of an emotional freak when I was a kid. I told Squeaker tonight that I was a lot like her when I was around her age. I cried a lot...when I was sad, scared, embarrassed, or angry. I was depressed a lot. I had (well, have) a hard time focusing. I was agonizingly shy. I hated meeting new people. I was afraid of new situations and afraid of going to school because I might do something stupid, which I did pretty much daily...and actually still do. I should probably point out that I had a very good childhood. I have wonderful, loving, Godly parents and terrific siblings. I just have one of those quirky little brains that doesn't want to balance it's chemicals right or something. With a great deal of painful effort I have gotten over most of these things. But my comfort zone is pretty small and I'm outside of it almost all of the time.
So ,despite my discomfort, I really do understand a lot of the emotions that Squeaker is going through. I know her mixed-up emotions are coming not only from mental illness but also from her very abusive history. The physical abuse was bad enough but the reports on the emotional and verbal abuse she suffered made me cringe when I first read them.
Needless to say, we spend a lot of time in messy, chaotic emotional overload when working through past and present issues. In some respects my instinctive desire to distance myself can be helpful because my feelings are not easily hurt by hateful comments that seem inevitible from traumatized kids. There is much I could just let slide in order not to deal with the constant barrage of emotions. But for her sake, I must jump in with both feet and muck around in it with her. It stretches me too because I must get over myself and my reactions in order to help her. I'm not all that good at it but I empathize and hug and correct distorted thinking when I can. She reveals more of who she really is each time and each time I tell her I love her no matter what. And we reclaim lost ground and sometimes take a few tottering steps towards healing.
And I feel uncomfortable and stupid but I psych myself up to do it all over again the next time, because inch by precious inch we're somehow moving forward.
For the record, I am not all that comfortable with over-the-top displays of emotion. Which is funny as they are a major occupational hazard for foster/adoptive parents of traumatized kids. Also kind of funny considering I felt like a bit of an emotional freak when I was a kid. I told Squeaker tonight that I was a lot like her when I was around her age. I cried a lot...when I was sad, scared, embarrassed, or angry. I was depressed a lot. I had (well, have) a hard time focusing. I was agonizingly shy. I hated meeting new people. I was afraid of new situations and afraid of going to school because I might do something stupid, which I did pretty much daily...and actually still do. I should probably point out that I had a very good childhood. I have wonderful, loving, Godly parents and terrific siblings. I just have one of those quirky little brains that doesn't want to balance it's chemicals right or something. With a great deal of painful effort I have gotten over most of these things. But my comfort zone is pretty small and I'm outside of it almost all of the time.
So ,despite my discomfort, I really do understand a lot of the emotions that Squeaker is going through. I know her mixed-up emotions are coming not only from mental illness but also from her very abusive history. The physical abuse was bad enough but the reports on the emotional and verbal abuse she suffered made me cringe when I first read them.
Needless to say, we spend a lot of time in messy, chaotic emotional overload when working through past and present issues. In some respects my instinctive desire to distance myself can be helpful because my feelings are not easily hurt by hateful comments that seem inevitible from traumatized kids. There is much I could just let slide in order not to deal with the constant barrage of emotions. But for her sake, I must jump in with both feet and muck around in it with her. It stretches me too because I must get over myself and my reactions in order to help her. I'm not all that good at it but I empathize and hug and correct distorted thinking when I can. She reveals more of who she really is each time and each time I tell her I love her no matter what. And we reclaim lost ground and sometimes take a few tottering steps towards healing.
And I feel uncomfortable and stupid but I psych myself up to do it all over again the next time, because inch by precious inch we're somehow moving forward.
Friday, September 26, 2008
Hello? Hello?
Each night this week some guy has called our answering machine between 8:30 and 9:00 and said only, "Hello? Hello?" before hanging up. Weird.
Not unlike what I feel like saying to the kids everyday when I talk to them and get no response. "Hello? Hello? Is this thing on?"
I understand my parents so much better now that I have kids. Only my dad always said, "Are there words coming out of my mouth?" I don't think it's that we become our parents so much as some inherent ability that kids have to drive adults nuts and exterminate parental brain cells in the same way generation after generation.
But what goes around comes around. They'll probably be parents some day too.
Not unlike what I feel like saying to the kids everyday when I talk to them and get no response. "Hello? Hello? Is this thing on?"
I understand my parents so much better now that I have kids. Only my dad always said, "Are there words coming out of my mouth?" I don't think it's that we become our parents so much as some inherent ability that kids have to drive adults nuts and exterminate parental brain cells in the same way generation after generation.
But what goes around comes around. They'll probably be parents some day too.
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Radio
We're from San Diego. It's a great city and we miss it even though we visit frequently and still go to church in one of the northern suburbs. We know many social workers there. Even some that don't know us personally know us by reputation after having fostered hundreds of kids. We haven't heard good things about our new county's department of children's service and have chosen so far not to be relicensed here.
However, there were very many good reasons to move a year ago and we are mostly happy with our decision.
One of the benefits is that we now can listen to Christian music radio which we did not have in San Diego (the country stations here are not as good but that's another story). Since I've banned the rap and R&B stations, it is especially nice that the kids have found and enjoy alternative Christian music. It's great to hear them singing the words of uplifting songs like the ones below rather than the suggestive lyrics from some of their old music. Thanks Air1! (P.S. I know he's not alternative but a little Steven Curtis Chapman in the mix couldn't hurt.)
Third Day "Call My Name"
Brandon Heath "Give Me Your Eyes"
Stellar Kart "Life is Good"
However, there were very many good reasons to move a year ago and we are mostly happy with our decision.
One of the benefits is that we now can listen to Christian music radio which we did not have in San Diego (the country stations here are not as good but that's another story). Since I've banned the rap and R&B stations, it is especially nice that the kids have found and enjoy alternative Christian music. It's great to hear them singing the words of uplifting songs like the ones below rather than the suggestive lyrics from some of their old music. Thanks Air1! (P.S. I know he's not alternative but a little Steven Curtis Chapman in the mix couldn't hurt.)
Third Day "Call My Name"
Brandon Heath "Give Me Your Eyes"
Stellar Kart "Life is Good"
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
At the Breakfast Table
Breakfast conversations can be interesting because we do not always sit down with the kids to eat but are always in the general area. My computer is near the dining room so when I am working in the mornings I often jump in if the exchange between kids gets out of of hand.
A few days ago, Drama Boy and Squeaker had an interesting conversation which I chose to stay out of because Squeaker handled it pretty well on her own.
She started by saying something about being like "my mom".
DB: "Well, I don't know because I never met your mom."
SQ: "I meant that mom right there. If I was talking about my other mom I would have said (birth mom's first name)."
DB "Why are you so mad at your mom?"
SQ: "I'm not mad at her any more. But right now we share DNA and that's about it."
DB: (starting to get upset) "I just don't see why you hate her so much."
SQ: "I don't hate her. I just have a new family now. Why are you getting so angry about what I call my birth mom?"
DB: (still agitated) "I'm not mad, I'm just saying. I would never hold a grudge on my mom."
SQ: "Just because I call her by her first name now doesn't mean I'm holding a grudge. I don't see why you are getting so upset. It doesn't have anything to do with what you call your mom."
DB: "I would just never do that to my mom."
Squeaker handled the whole thing surprisingly well, not getting angry or putting on a big dramatic emotional display as she usually does. I don't know if Drama Boy thinks we want him to denounce his birth family or what. Not only does he constantly imply that adoptive relationships are not real but also that the adoptees are disloyal to their orginal family even, as in the case of Peaches, they are still very much connected to them.
Yesterday, he intentionally referred to Squeaker by her old last name just to bug her. That time she did get angry especially when he continued to do so after she corrected him.
This messy mix of dealing with fierce devotion to families of origin while creating a whole new family through older child adoption is an interesting road to travel. Especially with kids so bent on finding ways to hurt and annoy.
A few days ago, Drama Boy and Squeaker had an interesting conversation which I chose to stay out of because Squeaker handled it pretty well on her own.
She started by saying something about being like "my mom".
DB: "Well, I don't know because I never met your mom."
SQ: "I meant that mom right there. If I was talking about my other mom I would have said (birth mom's first name)."
DB "Why are you so mad at your mom?"
SQ: "I'm not mad at her any more. But right now we share DNA and that's about it."
DB: (starting to get upset) "I just don't see why you hate her so much."
SQ: "I don't hate her. I just have a new family now. Why are you getting so angry about what I call my birth mom?"
DB: (still agitated) "I'm not mad, I'm just saying. I would never hold a grudge on my mom."
SQ: "Just because I call her by her first name now doesn't mean I'm holding a grudge. I don't see why you are getting so upset. It doesn't have anything to do with what you call your mom."
DB: "I would just never do that to my mom."
Squeaker handled the whole thing surprisingly well, not getting angry or putting on a big dramatic emotional display as she usually does. I don't know if Drama Boy thinks we want him to denounce his birth family or what. Not only does he constantly imply that adoptive relationships are not real but also that the adoptees are disloyal to their orginal family even, as in the case of Peaches, they are still very much connected to them.
Yesterday, he intentionally referred to Squeaker by her old last name just to bug her. That time she did get angry especially when he continued to do so after she corrected him.
This messy mix of dealing with fierce devotion to families of origin while creating a whole new family through older child adoption is an interesting road to travel. Especially with kids so bent on finding ways to hurt and annoy.
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Recall
And I thought some social workers had way too much power over kids' lives....
The judge rewarded Sparky and DB's birth mom again despite the fact that she's not playing by the rules. She will be allowed to take them out of school (for Drama Boy it's testing week) to a three day parent/child rehab program. This is before she is even permitted unsupervised or overnight visits.
Yeah...ooooookay. After four years they suddenly need to be involved in her rehab? As the social worker said, it's her addiction not theirs and they've been removed from it for a while.
I'm just not gettin' it. Maybe it's just me.
The judge rewarded Sparky and DB's birth mom again despite the fact that she's not playing by the rules. She will be allowed to take them out of school (for Drama Boy it's testing week) to a three day parent/child rehab program. This is before she is even permitted unsupervised or overnight visits.
Yeah...ooooookay. After four years they suddenly need to be involved in her rehab? As the social worker said, it's her addiction not theirs and they've been removed from it for a while.
I'm just not gettin' it. Maybe it's just me.
Almost Too Easy
After dealing with Sparky's daily antics for so long it's almost hard to know what to do with peace...okay semi-peace. Drama Boy still takes every opportunity to have a go at Lucky while she continues to put herself in the middle of everyone else's disagreements. Seamonkey and The Boss argue all the day long. Squeaker has an hysterical edge to her voice when talking about math class and has been more irritable than usual since school started. (After talking to her special ed teacher, it comes as no surprise that she is creating the problems for herself in math class.)
Still that's a far cry from over-turned furniture, kicking holes in doors and walls, screeching to annoy, and outright defiance.
Sparky did come for the weekend and was friendly, helpful, generous, appreciative, and entirely pleasant. We hope this keeps up on visits so the boys can see each other regularly. It was an easy weekend for a visit since three of the other kids were gone visiting different family members.
Court again today for the boys but Ana couldn't go because Lucky had a doctor's appointment at the same time. Can't wait to hear what the judge decides to do next especially in light of their mom and grandma's obvious disregard of his instructions last time.
Still that's a far cry from over-turned furniture, kicking holes in doors and walls, screeching to annoy, and outright defiance.
Sparky did come for the weekend and was friendly, helpful, generous, appreciative, and entirely pleasant. We hope this keeps up on visits so the boys can see each other regularly. It was an easy weekend for a visit since three of the other kids were gone visiting different family members.
Court again today for the boys but Ana couldn't go because Lucky had a doctor's appointment at the same time. Can't wait to hear what the judge decides to do next especially in light of their mom and grandma's obvious disregard of his instructions last time.
Sunday, September 21, 2008
Shorn
The boys were getting shaggy so a good bit of my Saturday went to hair cutting.
Cooper, The Boss, Johnny Cash
BEFORE
AFTER
There was obviously more wind and sun for the "after" picture so my subjects were not as cooperative but I don't think it was strictly necessary for Cooper to poke his tongue at me.
Cooper, The Boss, Johnny Cash
BEFORE
AFTER
There was obviously more wind and sun for the "after" picture so my subjects were not as cooperative but I don't think it was strictly necessary for Cooper to poke his tongue at me.
Saturday, September 20, 2008
This Just In
News Flash! Drama Boy now saying he really wants to stay...but wants Sparky to move back in.
Poor emotionally fragile kid getting mucked up by family visits every weekend. By the time he recovers and comes to his senses it's time to go back for more.
That judge must have some seriously loose screws to be allowing this.
Poor emotionally fragile kid getting mucked up by family visits every weekend. By the time he recovers and comes to his senses it's time to go back for more.
That judge must have some seriously loose screws to be allowing this.
Breathe, Breathe, Breathe
Every day I am resolved to handle things more calmly and patiently and not be drawn into the emotional chaos that the kids seem to constantly swaddle themselves in.
Yeah, so tomorrow that needs to go back on the top of my list.
I actually did pretty okay during Squeaker's melt-downs today but totally lost patience with The Boss. Lately his smart-alecky attitude and his frenetic bouncing, punching, drumming, and finger-shooting has been kind of tough for me to take. That's all on me and not him, but he's pretty exhausting sometimes. Ana rescued me a couple times when I needed a break although she got pummeled by fists and feet during one of his inexplicable screaming fits.
Squeaker has had several days of histrionics over her mainstream math class. I actually think her teacher is a bit of a jerk which does not excuse her behavior in any way.
Today she did not have homework because she "was not in his class long enough to get it". Every time I probed for more information she would scream at me so I had to walk away and try again when she was calm. She hates this guy and he doesn't seem to like her much either. He won't excuse her to use the restroom even though it is in her IEP that she may be excused as needed due to a medical condition. When he does let her go he teases her about the frequency of it. I'm not sure he'll think it's so funny if she has an accident in his classroom. He sounds pretty tough on all the kids and the way Squeaker talks about him I know he's getting major attitude from her.
Today's misadventure started during roll call. He called her name and she said "Here" with that tone. You know the one I mean. So he said "Here?" and she responded (I'm sure this time the tone was paired with the look ), "I said here but I wish I wasn't". So he told her to pack her things and head back to her resource classroom.
I get the tone and the look frequently so I can understand his irritation. She's probably being a major stinker for him every day. But, good grief, buddy....IEP...Emotionally Disturbed Classroom...Bipolar Disorder. And you were expecting what? This guy needs to get with the program and be part of the solution. Yes, she's hard to deal with but she's gotta get an education. Somehow we have to come up with a response that is less punitive and more about getting her to calm down and act appropriately so she can do the work.
She wants to transfer into the other Algebra 1 class and I want her pulled from mainstream math and back to the special ed class leaving her only with mainstream English and P.E. Math may be her best subject but it also the source of most of our school battles.
Although we don't yet agree on what action to take, I told her that she needs to stop letting her problems in her math class interfere with her relationships at home. She agreed to stop screaming at me when I ask her about her math. That resolve should last until about Monday, I would guess.
So we resolved away....and then my two troublesome babies and I went and checked out the new restaurant in town, finishing off with a Mile-High Mud Pie and three spoons.
I think The Boss ate most of it which might explain some if his bounciness tonight.
Yeah, so tomorrow that needs to go back on the top of my list.
I actually did pretty okay during Squeaker's melt-downs today but totally lost patience with The Boss. Lately his smart-alecky attitude and his frenetic bouncing, punching, drumming, and finger-shooting has been kind of tough for me to take. That's all on me and not him, but he's pretty exhausting sometimes. Ana rescued me a couple times when I needed a break although she got pummeled by fists and feet during one of his inexplicable screaming fits.
Squeaker has had several days of histrionics over her mainstream math class. I actually think her teacher is a bit of a jerk which does not excuse her behavior in any way.
Today she did not have homework because she "was not in his class long enough to get it". Every time I probed for more information she would scream at me so I had to walk away and try again when she was calm. She hates this guy and he doesn't seem to like her much either. He won't excuse her to use the restroom even though it is in her IEP that she may be excused as needed due to a medical condition. When he does let her go he teases her about the frequency of it. I'm not sure he'll think it's so funny if she has an accident in his classroom. He sounds pretty tough on all the kids and the way Squeaker talks about him I know he's getting major attitude from her.
Today's misadventure started during roll call. He called her name and she said "Here" with that tone. You know the one I mean. So he said "Here?" and she responded (I'm sure this time the tone was paired with the look ), "I said here but I wish I wasn't". So he told her to pack her things and head back to her resource classroom.
I get the tone and the look frequently so I can understand his irritation. She's probably being a major stinker for him every day. But, good grief, buddy....IEP...Emotionally Disturbed Classroom...Bipolar Disorder. And you were expecting what? This guy needs to get with the program and be part of the solution. Yes, she's hard to deal with but she's gotta get an education. Somehow we have to come up with a response that is less punitive and more about getting her to calm down and act appropriately so she can do the work.
She wants to transfer into the other Algebra 1 class and I want her pulled from mainstream math and back to the special ed class leaving her only with mainstream English and P.E. Math may be her best subject but it also the source of most of our school battles.
Although we don't yet agree on what action to take, I told her that she needs to stop letting her problems in her math class interfere with her relationships at home. She agreed to stop screaming at me when I ask her about her math. That resolve should last until about Monday, I would guess.
So we resolved away....and then my two troublesome babies and I went and checked out the new restaurant in town, finishing off with a Mile-High Mud Pie and three spoons.
I think The Boss ate most of it which might explain some if his bounciness tonight.
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Please Say It Isn't So!
Both little boys have colds. Boogery noses are a hassle and two at once......sigh.
The Boss keeps sneezing snot all over his hands and then has an hysterical Monk-like freak-out, "I have boogers! I have to wash my hands!" He does cover his nose when he sneezes, so that's a plus.
Grandson wipes his nose on the upper part of his sleeve, smearing boogies across his cheek until it's red and chapped.
Who says my life isn't exciting?
The Boss keeps sneezing snot all over his hands and then has an hysterical Monk-like freak-out, "I have boogers! I have to wash my hands!" He does cover his nose when he sneezes, so that's a plus.
Grandson wipes his nose on the upper part of his sleeve, smearing boogies across his cheek until it's red and chapped.
Who says my life isn't exciting?
Follow-Through
Some way-too-big bites at dinner prompted a reproof that "If you have to angle your head all around to get the food into your mouth, it's too big of a bite."
Which launched a smattering of reminders from around the table:
"If it smears food all over your lips, it's too big of a bite."
"If your food hits your face, it's too big of a bite."
"If your cheek bulges out when you chew, it's too big of a bite."
"If you can only chew it with your mouth open, it's too big of a bite."
"If food is partially hanging out of your mouth when you take the fork away, it's too big of a bite."
"If you have to unhinge your jaw like a snake to get it in, it's too big of a bite."
Naturally, they all continued to do these things but at least they know their material.
Which launched a smattering of reminders from around the table:
"If it smears food all over your lips, it's too big of a bite."
"If your food hits your face, it's too big of a bite."
"If your cheek bulges out when you chew, it's too big of a bite."
"If you can only chew it with your mouth open, it's too big of a bite."
"If food is partially hanging out of your mouth when you take the fork away, it's too big of a bite."
"If you have to unhinge your jaw like a snake to get it in, it's too big of a bite."
Naturally, they all continued to do these things but at least they know their material.
Can We Skip Mornings?
Sparing you the details here's how the kids did this morning: oversleeping, food-wasting, moping, sulking, accusations, shouting match, glaring, ignoring, pants-wetting, P.E. clothes losing, demanding.
Still, over-all it was fairly calm and with all the late-start schools we never seem to be rushing.
Ana laughed at my use of the word "impinge" when talking to one of the kids. What? It's a real word and I used it correctly in a mini-lecture after getting the full-on attitude bit when I stopped one of the kids from making a rude comment. Yes, I was feeling somewhat snappish this morning and it's a satisfyingly snappy word.
Gotta get a grip and let everyone's morning sulkiness go as it usually wears off by the time they get home.
Another rough morning for Squeaker but at least she left on a shared joke afer she reeled backwards into me when putting on her backpack. She's gonna need a new backpack and a new back before the end of 8th grade.
Still, over-all it was fairly calm and with all the late-start schools we never seem to be rushing.
Ana laughed at my use of the word "impinge" when talking to one of the kids. What? It's a real word and I used it correctly in a mini-lecture after getting the full-on attitude bit when I stopped one of the kids from making a rude comment. Yes, I was feeling somewhat snappish this morning and it's a satisfyingly snappy word.
Gotta get a grip and let everyone's morning sulkiness go as it usually wears off by the time they get home.
Another rough morning for Squeaker but at least she left on a shared joke afer she reeled backwards into me when putting on her backpack. She's gonna need a new backpack and a new back before the end of 8th grade.
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